We’ve been talking a lot about Thanksgiving in our household recently. Maybe it’s the unseasonably crisp morning air. Perhaps it’s the sight of the nearby apple orchards and pumpkin patches laden with fruit, ready to burst forth with their fall harvests. It could be because this year it coincides with Callen’s birthday, and having just observed umpteen family birthdays in the months of August and September, Callen is eager for his day.
Or maybe it’s just because we’re so darn thankful.
In the past two weeks we’ve shared in several monumental and emotional occasions. Last Sunday, Callen was acknowledged by the ASK Childhood Cancer Foundation as one of its 2014 “Kourageous Kids”. The event was marked by portrait unveilings and a brief tribute to each honoree. And while the grown ups held back tears, the little ones let loose with pure joy in the carnival-like atmosphere and truly celebrated what it means to be a child. Who just happens to have cancer.
Six days later we walked, skipped (Olivia Tyson!) and ran with the largest team in the history of the ReeseStrong 5K & Gold Ribbon Kid’s Run. Go TeamCallen! The race was capped off with a festival of food and fun, and what energy hadn’t been expended in exercise was put to good use in bouncy houses, super slides, face painting and face stuffing. And running amok amidst us all were the exuberant children of our community. Some of whom just happen to have cancer.
No sooner had we come down from these emotional -and sugar- highs, it was time to celebrate Olivia’s 7th birthday. We capped off a day that was (finally!) all about her with my annual reading of On the Night You Were Born. I struggled to finish the first sentence before my voice broke with emotion and tears spilled over onto the page. And by the time “the night wind whispered ‘Life will never be the same’”, I was in a full-blown blubber. Because never before had I conceived of a time when one of these precious children might not be present for this ritual. The mere thought of it was suffocating. Once again, cancer was the unwelcomed party crasher.
These three events have all coincided with the 6-month anniversary of Callen’s diagnosis -that week in March when life as we knew it came to an abrupt end. It’s human nature to mark milestones, be they joyous occasions of birthdays, weddings and the like, or more somber observations of life’s passages. Inherent in these occasions is reflection, comparison, reaffirmation and refocusing.
For me, the observance of this time stamp has been no different.
These commemorations have been almost overwhelming in their poignancy. Despite the upbeat and celebratory façades, their funereal and elegiac undercurrents tug at me and threaten to drag me under. I abhor the reason behind these gatherings. I loathe that any child, let alone my own flesh and blood, is in a fight for his life. I despise this disease, what it takes from them, and what it requires of them. I detest that the mettle of our children must be tested in this fashion. I spurn the natural order of life being challenged in this way.
But as profound as that hatred is, my gratitude runs yet deeper.
And so I cannot let another moment go by without extending a long-overdue and totally insufficient “thank you” to each and every one of you who has gotten us to this moment. You mobilized while we figured out how to put one foot in front of the other. Helped us find our breath. Nourished our bodies and souls. Gave of your time and talents. Visited, prayed, called, texted, emailed, posted and wrote. Cried with us and for us. Raised money, awareness and the collective conscious on our behalf. Donated a variety of bodily fluids to the greater good. Provided our children with a seemingly endless supply of distractions. Blanketed us - literally and figuratively - with love. Made our family your family and our son your son. You are demonstratively relentless in your resolve to see us through this ordeal. The abundance of your affection, the strength of your commitment, and the tenacity of your spirit humble us.
WE are TeamCallen. And for that, we are indeed thankful.
